Where Did It Go?

Are you asking yourself, where the big, red Suburban went? It's gone. It really was the last thing to go and I cried. We are officially assetless. It's not a place that I ever wanted to be. However, we've come to this place of realization that no matter what you have here, if you have an expensive house or an expensive car, if you've got trust funds, IRA funds, stocks and bonds, or even if you have all your ducks in a row, it really all doesn't matter. What really and truly is the bottom line, is the assets you are building for Christ. Yes, I enjoyed having that car. It was a blessing not only to us, but to those who were driven to the store, to Bible study, to pick up medicine, to run a stranger to the gas station and jump his dead battery and to those who simply rode in it going from here to there. But mostly, I cried because of this situation we are in that seems to have no end.

The one thing that I find most frustrating is talking to the customer service representatives, otherwise known as creditors. When you set up payment agreements with one person, you have another one call you from the same company who assures you that what you set up previously is unacceptable. We had talked to a representative who said if we could come up with one payment that perhaps we would be able to split the next payment up. So we followed her instructions and made the payment. The very next day, 'our case manager', who was really quite snippy, would not accept that agreement and was all out bent on sending the 'repo' guy out.

So on Christmas night, when all were in bed, except my husband and my teenage son, they came for it, setting off the alarm and waking the neighborhood. My husband kindly went out there to offer them the keys, shocking the repo man that he was not raving mad. In return for his sincere and kind attitude, he was able to get the carseat out of it and my Altoids.

It could really make you mad that things happen the way they do, but we really prayed about it. We know that for some unknown reason to us, at this point, all of this stuff is happening and we just have to trust God that He is going to work it all out. Having only one car is really going to be inconvenient. It's going to make things more difficult with scheduling but it is, what it is. God knows our needs and we just have to leave it to Him to work out because everything we've tried to do in our humanness is not and has not worked out. God clearly wants to do something here but the waiting is driving me nutty.

In the midst of all this trauma, I've felt God telling me to just trust Him and to continue praising Him. It's a hard thing to do sometimes, especially when you feel much like a failure or that you feel like God is letting you down. Then, I was reminded of Job. He lost everything and the one thing that stood out to me was his wife. She let her anger and bitterness turn her into this woman who was unsupportive and hateful. That is not the person who I believe God wants me to be nor do I want to let the things of this life, like what we are going through, distract me from what God really wants me to learn from all of this.

So instead of shaking my fist, stomping up and down and having myself a good ol' temper tantrum, I praise God for his mercy. I praise Him for the time that we were able to use the vehicle, for the time He allowed us to live in our home, for taking care of us and providing for our needs. We were so blessed this holiday with so many surprise blessings and we know that God directed them. Even in the midst of heartbreaking crises, somewhere in the middle of it, you will see God's hand of blessing. We have felt His tender care through so many wonderful people and for that I am so eternally grateful.

Christmas 2008

We had a very nice Christmas. God blessed us so much and through that blessing, the kids had presents to unwrap. This Christmas truly was a reminder and tangible evidence that we have nothing except for God's gift to us, Jesus. Through His gift, we have the blessing of eternal life.

Some of my favorite parts were spending time with family, cooking and preparing yummy goodies to share. The kids were gathered together to start the unwrapping of the 'prizes' yesterday morning when all of the sudden Kara said...shhhh, placing her hand to her ear, she exclaimed that she could hear ho, ho, ho! She's quite the card at only two years old. Then, later that day as we were getting into the car, Kara had her little mini m&m container that had been devoured the night before. After getting buckled in, she popped it open and I saw a bunch of nerd's candies in there. Apparently, she had been looting all the kids candy from their stockings and decided to refill her container...for the road!

The only downside to all of our fun is that my camera decided to act up and not work. Isn't there a law that says thou camera shalt work on Christmas capturing all those precious moments?? I think I might have gotten maybe one shot to work but only some of the kids are in it. It's just a crying shame. Guess I'll have to put a new camera on my birthday list. Thank goodness, it's not too far away! I'd hate to miss one single moment getting on film!

Congratulations!

Congratulations goes out to our two blessed winners:

Carlos Gonzalez from Spencer, IA!

Christy Small from Coshocton, OH!

We look forward to helping you with your computer issues.

Merry Christmas, all!

Christmas Give Away!

We here at Bob's PC Pro know how important it is to keep your computer running as smooth as possible and when it's not, frustration happens. People threaten to take a bat to it or throw it out the window. So with all that in mind, we want to relieve some of that stress and offer a special Christmas Give Away!

The prize: One hour FREE of REMOTE computer support.

For those of you who do not know what remote support is, I'll explain. It's when you get to sit in your home in you pajamas and let us connect to your computer from our office. It's consent-based and performed through Crossloop. It's completely secure and you have the ability to disconnect our remote connection at any time. Of course, you must be able to get on the internet for this to work.

This Free hour of remote computer support that we are giving away could include troubleshooting that nagging problem with pop up's, general clean up, browser optimization, spyware scan and/or removal, nagging software installation, upgrading recommendations, removing dusty old software, advice or questions you may have on your mind about your computer, or simple training.

To enter this give away, simply send your name and email address to Heather@bobspcpro.com so that we can let the winner know that they've won the prize! The drawing will be held tomorrow (December 25, 2008) at noon (EST)!

Merry Christmas!

Handling Disappointment

There are a variety of emotions that we go through depending on the situations that we face. Sometimes we end up on a roller coaster, sometimes up, followed by a sharp decline, followed by a sharp incline that leads into a corkscrew, around and around we go.

I'm really struggling with disappointment and the loss of control. We all have certain things we are happy with and really like. Perhaps it's a car, a house, a newly remodeled kitchen, or perhaps it's someone you really care about. How do you handle the reality when things are lost?

I was really proud of the way my husband could figure out impossible technology problems. It was a gift that God blessed him with and a passion for him. It made him excellent at what he did and allowed him to have a really amazing job. Between offshoring, downsizing and some sudden health complications, his job was taken away. So we decided to embark on a desire he has carried in his heart for as long as I've known him, our business.

Now a year and a half later, I look at where we are at financially, physically and spiritually. It's hard not to succumb to extreme disappointment. It's heart breaking to watch your husband laying there in pain and feel completely helpless. It's hard not to get angry and scream and jump up and down in a temper tantrum. This is so not how I ever imagined my life would be, for us as a couple or us as a family. It's hard to give up your dream. It's hard to face the reality that you physically can no longer do the things that you could once do. Sometimes I feel as if I am suffocating, that the breath is being squeezed out of me. How do you handle that reality?

Sometimes God's plan is way different than ours. In my humanness, I cannot understand why we are going through this or for what purpose. It's hard not knowing. In my mind, it would be so much easier to bear if I could just understand. It's hard to understand why God, who loves me so much, would continue allowing all these horrific things to happen. How do you handle that reality?

The reality is this. Life is so much more than we can fathom. The things that we go through, as believers in the Lord God Almighty, are not for nothing. These things are being lived out here and now for then, Heaven. We are being molded, shaped and formed into being more Christ-like. God's ways are higher than our ways and if it was for me to understand, He would let me in on the secret.

Can you imagine longing for a child for years and year and years until you, in the natural, could no longer have them. All that you are left with is the promise that God whispered in your heart. How do you handle that reality? Well, you continue to trust and believe that God will fulfill that promise. God is in His own time frame not ours. In His perfect time, when no other could claim the glory for a promise fulfilled, He gave Abraham and Sarah the child that He promised them. But then, He asked them to give the child up. How do you handle that reality? You be obedient to what God has called you to do.

God wants so desperately to know that your belief and trust is real. That you are not just trusting in Him so you can get what you want. He is not this sugar daddy in the sky showering down what we ask for so that life can be all rainbows and sunshine. His desire is at your heart. He personally knows disappointment. Look at mankind. He personally knows loss of control. Look at free will. He desires all of us to come to Him freely not because He makes you.

So in my disappointments, my struggles and my frustrations, I purposefully choose not to be offended at the One who gave me this life but instead to be obedient to what He has called me to do and be. I lay down those things that have let me down and I ask God to heal my broken heart and to restore my life as He wants it to be, not what I want. I long for His plan to be my plan. I continue to pray that He will turn things around and show His amazing grace, mercy and glory to all who can see. I look for the moment when no other can claim His glory for a promise fulfilled.

Psalm 34:18-19 The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those who are crushed in spirit. The righteous face many troubles, but the Lord rescues them from each and every one.

Thankful hearts

Thanksgiving is a time to celebrate the bounty of the harvest and to reflect on how blessed we are, to give our thanks and praise to God for His provision.

Ever year we go around our Thanksgiving table and tell three things we are grateful for. It usually ends up being quite an emotional time as we are open and honest about the things that are on our hearts. Of course, the kids add a bit of laughter to the mix as they are thankful for silly things. If truth be told, the silly things are just as important.

This year has been one of the roughest ones we had to endure, with losing our home, being in the financial state we are in, with Bob's health, living from one shut off notice to another. Many people have said that there wasn't much to be thankful for but in spite of all this agony, we are so grateful. We praise God for all that we have seen, for His hand of grace and blessing on us.

Today, I am so utterly thankful for....

my children who are healthy and so full of life

my husband who inspite of his unbearable pain refuses to quit living life

for the 'six month grace period' that allows us to live in our home

for the food that amazingly shows up at our door providing our 'daily' manna

for the short times our electricity, phone, cable modem get shut off and then turned back on

for the money that surprisingly shows up at just the right moment

for the mercy God shows us daily

for the grace of God that we live under

for family and friends who amaze us with their encouragement and support

for the unspeakable gifts God blesses us with

for the life that was given so that I can have a relationship with my Abba Father

I was thinking the other day that we've now off-loaded all the material things that hold us to this earth. Our focus has been directed towards what is really important and that is Christ, in Him alone. We've been awoken from our slumbering relationship with Him and found that He is the true source of everything. No longer are we lukewarm but alive in Him. He is the fire that burns within us. He holds the stars in the sky and the water in the sea. No longer are the words, you've just got to trust God, words without meaning but we know first hand what that means. For this understanding, I am so completely and utterly thankful. Our relationship with Christ is the one thing that truly matters. I am so thankful He chose me to be His.