Sunday, May 24, 2009

A Gracious God

We've been walking this road of unknown for quite some time now. God has been stretching, pruning, refining and rebuilding a faith in us that strong enough to withstand what we are going through. Just this morning, during worship at church, we were singing a song about standing firm on the foundation and it hit me that that was what was happening. People comment to me that they just don't know how we are making it through this and the answer to that is this: We have firmly planted our selves on the firm foundation of Jesus Christ, the rock of our salvation. So that when the storm is raging around us, we know that foundation will hold firm. We may trip and fall but we will not crumble.

It's amazing to me how much an empty refrigerator can tangle my emotions into a knot. When you have hungry stomachs looking up at you because there isn't a whole lot to eat, it's enough to push you to the edge and beyond. The thing that gets me is that time and time again, my husband and I have stood in front of our refrigerator and prayed that God would fill it and He has. I know this. I've seen it happen over and over and yet, I still get distraught when we happen to go through a time that is quite sparse. I want so very badly to get my will and emotions to instantly act in agreement to what I know in my heart. God promises to provide and He has and continues to do so.

After enduring a few days of a lean and echoing refrigerator this past week, I found myself having a bit of a temper tantrum letting God know just how much I was frustrated that He wasn't answering our prayer when I thought we needed it. My husband once again, reminded me that God will provide and together we brought our requests before Him. Later that night, I headed off to see a friend of mine. During my time with her, I got a call from my husband telling me my freezer was full. A friend of ours had brought over a bunch of meals that filled the entire freezer and then mentioned that there was more coming next month. I was speechless and I felt really, really small and a lot like a heel. I quickly asked God to forgive my rash behavior. He is an amazing God and I am just overwhelmed by how much he provides for our needs even when my behavior is less than stellar. A dear friend gently reminded me that God was not taken by surprise by my behavior. In fact, He already knew how I was going to respond. In spite of it, God loves me and his gracious mercy covers me daily.

It is good to be reminded that in spite of who we are, what we do and the choices we make, God is there in His amazing mercy and grace to pour himself out on us. Why? Because He loves us so very much. It doesn't matter what I do or how I act, He is there loving me in spite of it all.

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